Nothing we say is gonna save us from a fallout.
Dreadful. Today was just sooo dreadful. I just don't want to get the reasons laid out. I'm sorry but I'm still hurt. Embarrassment. Past. Shame. Failure. Loss. That's pretty much of a summary. All in all, in a complete package, PAIN.
WTH? Why do they have to come altogether? That started it. Math was better, thank goodness. There were still some good things to celebrate on. One thing about it was just not so bad. Little bit of it, really. I don't care if it's currently happening. I'm not affected by it, any way. Any hint? No way! :P
Science was irritating. Not the lesson, huh? But my activity sheet. I exerted a lot of effort on that one but it was lost. I was not able to check it, even. Damn! Really. I'm soooo irritated, or maybe agitated. Fvck. Sorry for the badwords but I just can't control my temper. I've reached my limit. I even cried at school. I just can't stop my tears from falling. Good thing I sobbed soundlessly.
P.E. was worse. Not the worst naman. But yeah, you get the picture. Next topic na. I don't want to talk about this one. Talk about being humiliated, that's it.
I really hate the fact that my activity sheet is lost. Call me crazy or maybe corny but I don't care. I wont care, either. Kase naman, I have my notes there and I really need to make bawi in Science because of the chaos that was my grade last quarter. I'm really feeling acerbic after P.E. and Science.
I managed to keep my temper on hold in Filipino. Because of that ghastly happening in the morning. I told my groupmates again and again whenever I start to feel irritated or ill-tempered so they'll listen and I wont undergo a tantrum, "Ayoko na. Naiinis na ko." and they'll listen. Buti na lang talaga. Yesterday, I had line as the same as that one. I said, "Tama na. Next topic naman. Naaasar na 'ko eh. Baka mamaya umiyak na 'ko." and "Tama na. Naiiyak na 'ko eh." Yes, ang babaw noh? But I was just being honest with the others. I don't want to break down in front of them. I can't afford to do so now. Or that time, whatever you want to use. But, yun nga, they respected that confession of mine and changed the topic. So as not to hurt me. I hope they'll be honest with me too when they feel offended or something.
Is it wrong? What I did, I mean. Oh, you could answer it. :)
That's all for tonight. Sorry for passing on my melancholy to all of you. I hope my desolation didn't affect you that much. I need my solitude for now. You know, time to be alone and to be able to talk to God about things, get enlightened. Haha. Yow, banal! Sige po. Thanks for reading my post today. Sorry again, kasi sad siya masyado. I'm just so depressed today.
Quote of the Day:
Reality means having no choice.
Give me a minute to restart my heart,